Small Talk

I am now the master of small talk
The world of dinner conversations and people
filling and killing time with words are my oyster
And I hear these words
and hear the meaning in the meaningless
And in my heart I want to burn all the tabloid magazines
in the grocery store check-out aisle
and watch people smile
who have not spoken in the last few minutes of their lives
I want to tell their stories, the quiet ones, and the loud ones
Vast brilliant stories that make you thirsty for good music
and make you remember all the life changing moments
you ever had while reading books
and feel all the laughter that has ever come out of your body
& all your friends faces are laughing too
& all of it sort of floating by like an old reel of film
in your mind
there is the cigarette burn in the top right corner
flicker, flicker
& you wonder what all these artists were chasing
& you wonder, “how did we get here?”

It was I who killed the cat
I couldn’t help myself
and my curiosity was always whispering in my ear

Now I am just sad that I never saw it before
& that I have let so many ideas slip away from me
into the ether
That’s where you will find me
trying to find them
& write them down
or put them in a birdcage
before they can fly away again

Always changing
This is the breath of all transitory creatures
And I can’t see they eyes
of my lovers anymore
And I remember that memory has its desires too
When can I see them again?

How many lives is this?
Am I number one or number 72?
You are an original thought
You are an original thought
You are an original thought
Don’t forget that

I wanted to write a story
but I always lose it

Now all I can remember are singing voices
and I wish there was something I could show
my little brother
So that he knew it would all be alright in the end
Even if I don’t know myself
that it will be alright
in the end

And now I lost it again
When can I see her smile?
When can I see her smile?
That is what I want
to make you smile
And to hear music on the piano
that reminds me of
all that was once possible
And the great soundscapes
Inside the minds
of an artist in flight
Beethoven’s view of beauty
and the crystallization of the soul
in one moment
when the Earth
and the Universe
were watching
and waiting
Wanting another dance
before the night had to end
& the music could only exist
in the heads of those
who craved the notes never stop

And silence
And silence
And silence
A music all its own

The world is breathing
but I cannot hear a heartbeat

Now all I want is for it not to stop
at least not now